First week of work

I survived my first week of work!  I'm exhausted, my brain is fried, and I've had more information thrown at me the past week then I can handle, but I haven't been this happy for a long time.  Every person I met was friendly and welcoming.  They all answered questions, told me they were happy I was there, and they were all excited to get to know me.  Or at least they were good at acting like they were.  People who I will probably never work with came over to introduce themselves and let me know if I needed anything to just ask.  This adoptee was blow out of the water.

It's funny, but nothing else in my life is going the way it "normally" should.  I guess I was just expecting that this would be another one of those things.  My family isn't what I consider "normal".  I have four parents.  That's just not right.  My boyfriend lives in another state.  That's not normal (though it's getting more and more normal with the Internet and online dating).  But still...  My friends live in Africa.  That's definitely not normal.  I could keep going, but I'll stop there.

I didn't have high expectations.  I was prepared for the worst, but hopeful for the best.  It worked out this time.  So at least I now have a good job.  It's something.  And of course I have my online community.  I can't ever forget that.  You don't know how much you all mean to me.  I wouldn't be here without you, and I really mean that.  Thank you :-)

Triggering Questions

I'm starting my new job next week.  I know I'm going to be asked all those questions as people try to get to know you.  The triggering ones.  The kinds that make adoptees cringe.  I wouldn't have cringed two years ago, but since entering reunion those questions are getting harder to answer.

So you live with your parents?
Um, yes?  No?  Which ones?

How many siblings do you have?
Well, I have three.  But legally I only have one.  And biologically I have two.  Did I mention that the biological ones don't know about me?  Can you count siblings you've never met?

What does your dad do for a living?
Which one?  One works for a utility company.  He's also an electrician.  Yes, I know how to wire basic stuff because I've watched him do it my whole life.  And I used to be his "helper".  My other dad is a postal worker.  I know how the mail system works in theory.  I call him when I want to find out when a package is going to get to my house because he knows turn around time and how much mail needs to be sorted before it gets to my town.  They are not the same guy.

Where are your parents from?
Again, which ones?  One set is from Boston.  That's why I talk with an accent sometimes.  My other set is from another city from southern Massachusetts.  That's where I was born.  I've never been back.  I have a ton of family there I've never met.

In actuality, I'll probably answer: yes, one, electrician, and Boston.  It's how I used to answer.  Only now I feel like I'm not answering correctly.  I don't feel the need to get into my personal life with my coworkers, but these questions are going to make me uncomfortable.  It stinks because non-adopted people don't really have to deal with these triggering questions (though I'm sure first mothers and adoptive parents have their own sets of triggering questions).

Unanswered Prayers

I'm no longer unemployed!  I got an amazing job offer from a great company that I'm going to take.  I will be starting work in about a month and I'll be on my way :-)  It's got me thinking though.  How many job's did I interview for that I really wanted and didn't get?  It all worked out in the end.  My unanswered prayers ended up being a great thing.

Things had to not work out in order for them to finally work out in the end.  I had to go through lots of rejection in order to find a job that was everything that I wanted.  Not only is this job a great position, but it's for a fantastic company where I can grow as a person and as an employee.  It's the perfect commute for me away from traffic and is in a great location where I can eventually move and afford to live.  It's also a good enough job offer that I'll be able to actually pay off my loans within a reasonable time, rather than having them take thirty years.  So all in all it really worked out for me.

I had to go through all that rejection, all the people telling me no, and finally something wonderful happened.  I guess it's true that you need bad things to happen to make the good things seem that much better. :-)