Sometimes it feels like my life is a movie and seeing as I'm really bad at coming up with titles, the title would be bad. This blog follows my journey through my personal adoption reunion.
Sometimes it feels like my life is a movie and seeing as I'm really bad at coming up with titles, the title would be bad. This blog follows my journey through my personal adoption reunion.
Facebook is how I found my daughter and reached out to her. It's been a good tool but also has kind of forced me to "share" before I really wanted to.
ReplyDeleteI made first contact with my first mother on Facebook. I got the letter from the CI that I could contact her and I was too afraid to call on the phone so I sent an email. I didn't get a reply, so I looked her up on Facebook and sent a request. She doesn't check her email ever but does check her facebook so it worked out. Through Facebook, I have been able to gradually get to know my Aunts and Uncles and cousins (I have a looottt).
ReplyDeleteI do like facebook for that. It's awesome. I helped find a friend's first mom on Facebook for her as well.
But I get into trouble with Facebook's privacy issues. When you post something on someone's page, "like" or comment on someone's post, or post on the wall of a page you're a "fan" of, it's liable to show up in the newsfeed of ALL of your friends, even if you're not mutual friends or mutual fans of the page you liked, posted, or commented on. Ridiculous right? A while ago when I was posting on adoptee support pages and commenting on current events not thinking it was being broadcasted in the faces of everyone I knew, I got yanked out of the adoption closet with my opinions (that I wasn't quite ready to share with friends and family yet) reaaal fast when my a-mom saw it, misunderstood and got upset. I always knew what you post online can be seen by others. I don't know why Facebook has to send it directly to the livefeed/newsfeed though.
That was a mess. I do less networking for adoption reform on facebook now because of it. I just don't feel like my friends and fam who aren't involved in reform seeing little clips of things here and there, misunderstanding, and then me having to explain it all.
Sorry for writing a book here lol.
I just found your blog! I'm writing about my reunion with my bio-father also. http://haleyandherfamilies.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteLove to hear your thoughts! Reunions can be really rough. I'm not in contact with my bio-mother any longer either.
Hi I'm new here as well. I'm an adoptive mom and have been searching various online sources to make my girls' birth family trees. I haven't heard of the free birthday online database before, so I will have to check that out. I use Facebook too to discover and see pictures of people who are related to my daughters, but may not even know they exist. One of my daughter's birthfathers recently joined Facebook, but we do not know him, and he chose not to be involved in the adoption process. I find I have to resist the urge to write him and see if he wants to know about his daughter. But thanks to Facebook I know where he works and what he looks like when the time comes to make contact.
ReplyDeletebirthmothertalks, that makes me nervous too. I'd be afraid that they would misinterpret something on my page if we were friends. I'm very careful about my page anyway, but talk about added stress.
ReplyDeleteAmanda, I totally hear you about everything showing up! I noticed BEFORE anyone commented, but I totally get it. I'm so careful about what I post now.
Haley, I'm really enjoying your blog! I think we have a lot in common on this journey.
April, welcome! I'm so happy to hear when I have adoptive parents reading this. I really value what you guys think and I think it's wonderful that you are doing this for your daughters. Kudos! I would have loved that :-)