Some People Just Shouldn't Speak

For once, I'm not the person my sister is mad at these days.  This is a rare occurrence, so I'm going to toot my own horn here for a bit.  My sister is superbly angry at my grandmother, and for once, I don't blame her.  In my experience, older people tend to forget that they need to filter what they say.  My grandmother's filter is gone.  You are a little bit overweight?  She'll ask you why you're so fat.  You're a different race?  She'll call you offensive words behind your back.  That's just how she is.  I've learned how to handle her to a certain extent (I play dummie and guilt her into dropping the subject) because confronting her about it never ends well.  My grandmother is also a master of the devastating phone call to all known relatives.  So you don't want to get on Nana's bad side.  That's never a good thing.  But this time she's crossed a line.

Backstory:  My uncle met a woman who had two children.  Their father had died tragically when they were very young.  My uncle moved in and helped to raise them.  This worked for them for a long time.  They called him Dad, but kept their last name and their OBCs.  After they were married and grown with kids of their own, they were formerly adopted by my uncle.  These kids never acted like they were in the family, never called my grandparents anything but their first names, and they never treated me like a cousin.  They never really fit in, but then again they never really tried.  At the same time, they are my cousins.  I have just as much connection with them as I do with my younger cousins.

So now that you have a rough idea of the set up, apparently my grandmother decided to talk about them with my sister.  She told my sister that they don't count as her grandchildren because they were adopted (I love how she says this to my adopted sister).  While she "likes" them, she doesn't "love" them and she doesn't see them as a part of her family.  While it's great that she's being honest, why would you say that to an adoptee?

Now I know that some people would think, well, she's old, she probably didn't realize that your sister was adopted Jenn.  My response?  My grandmother is the only person who acknowledges my "Gottcha Day", which my family always had the class to call "the-day-we-brought-you-home".  She is very aware that we are both adopted, more so than most in my family.  So she knew who she was talking to and what she was talking about.

So now me and my sister are both mad at my grandmother.  But we can't say anything.  I sort of hope that she tries to bring it up with me in the future.  Because I'd love to set her straight and guilt her into giving us both an apology.  I know how to do it because I used to live with her.  My sister doesn't know so she was forced to be silent.  But seriously, some people just shouldn't speak.