Apartment Hunting

I thought long and hard about how to handle my situation.  On one hand, I like living at home.  My parents have a very nice house.  I don't pay to live here.  I get to hang out with my mom a lot, and be there for her.  I get to eat yummy goodies that people drop by the house.  My car now has a space in the garage, so no shoveling snow off it come wintertime.  And my dog is here.  All valuable things to consider.

On the other hand, I offered to pay my parents the money they've (well my dad's) been requesting for rent in return for having my privacy in my room.  I was laughed at, mocked, and called crazy (and then "All the Single Ladies" was turned into "All the Crazy Ladies" for my benefit).  I finally got him to understand that it was important to me to have my own space, and he told me I wasn't allowed to speak.  That I would keep my room clean to his standards.  I explained that we had different standards and I wouldn't live like that.  Then he started to compromise.  I was told I could do whatever I wanted but he would check it once a month.  Again, told him that wasn't acceptable.  Finally he agreed that he would give me my privacy but that I'm not allowed to have food or drinks in my room.  To which I replied it's ridiculous to not allow someone water in their own room.

While it seems like progress, he did not understand what the big deal was.  Therefore, I give him two weeks before he changes his mind about the whole thing.  Plus, it's not just the privacy issue.  It's an issue of me walking through the door and being told to make dinner.  No "Hi!  How was your day?"  Just, "You're on supper duty and I'm hungry!"  Nice to see you too.  It's being yelled at for leaving my purse on the kitchen table because "only food belongs on there".  It's being criticized for picking up my phone when he called me at work.  It's being treated like an object, rather than a person.  It's being told that I need to be nicer to him because of "all he's done for me".  After all, he's put food in my mouth (I've been buying the groceries I eat), clothing me (hasn't bought me clothes since I turned 18, but apparently I need to be grateful for the other 18 years), and putting a roof over my head (he has me there).  I just don't think I can take it anymore.

I found a nice apartment.  It's safe, half way between work and home (so my commute would be easier but I could get home any time I wanted), its in my budget, and it's actually really nice.  It's not the Ritz, but it's a first apartment.  And it would be mine.  So I could leave my boots on the floor if I wanted to.  I could have a water bottle in my bedroom if I wanted to.  And I could do what I wanted to.  I'm 24.  It's time for me to move on.

I put in an application.  I have a few more questions for the rental company thanks to my first father (who was honored that I asked him for advice).  I'm still on the fence.  Things have gotten better the last few days at home.  But that doesn't mean they'll stay that way.  But I don't really love the thought of living by myself.  And I think that I'd almost rather stay home for a bit until I find an apartment that's not in a complex.  Those are harder to find, but sometimes work out a little bit better.  We'll see.

My parents don't know about the apartment yet.  I haven't told them because a) I'm not allowed to upset my mother, and b) my parents don't want me to move and therefore will do whatever it takes to keep me at home. So I need to make up my mind about moving before I talk to them.  Because I need to have an out.  I'm 24, they don't control me and I have my own life to live.

We'll see what happens.  I'm not sure.  I might not even get the apartment.  Only time will tell.  But it's guaranteed to be an interesting week.